Everyone’s story has a beginning, a middle and an end. The beginning is the past which cannot be changed. The past is the past and that is just the way it is, or was. It is important for us to know what the past was so maybe we can learn from it and understand who we are. The middle on the other hand is the present and it is still being written. The end is the final destination and is yet to be discovered but what we do today will determine where we end. If we want to finish strong, we need to be determined today to have a specific destination rather than just let life happen like so many do. This is my story.
When we deny the story, it defines us
When we own the story, we can write a brave new ending
Brene Brown
I come from humble beginnings. Born in the USA, yes, but into a poor family. I was the fourth of 4 sons and my Dad struggled to support us through retail jobs. Previously, my dad had been a Pastor in several locations which failed to provide for our family as it grew, so my Dad worked hard to provide through other means. I mention this because this determined my view of work, money and lack of wealth. It was a lot of delayed gratification and waiting to see what life has next. It did not get much better when my Dad left and my Mom had to go to work, it was tough times until my Mom and Stepfather came together.
My stepfather was an engineer and Vice President of a company and life changed for me only, because my brothers had already grown up. I now had an example of someone who was determined to succeed and had. He did his best to pass this on to me. The rest of my growing up was still based on what life brings and life was certainly much better, yet it was life determined by what my Stepfather did, not mine. I did take advantage of the opportunity presented and develop my skills as a musician as well as did my best in education to prepare for life. I also, at that time, felt an affinity to help young people so I would also embark of being a minister
I graduated High School determined to become a Youth and Music Pastor. Very much having the desire to help others which I still carry with me today but to also share my gifts (music, singing, guitar playing, song writer). There is one thing that continue to permeate through everything and that was I was just allowing life to happen, not really focus on a specific direction. There were many little successes but not enough focus to string them all together. Maybe you can relate. I did go to college studying basically ministry and would finally get to that career but not without a bunch of detours. More like just taking the next fork in the road and then the next and so on. I was searching for what would be my successful thing without understanding true focus, just hard work which I learned from my Dad.
Life was definitely up and down and all around because of searching for that one thing that will bring us success, not realizing, success does happen to you, but is who you are becoming. I did not have the right focus for sure. Married now, and trying many different professions. Falling into the restaurant business, which came natural to me, but was not what I really wanted to do. I did move up quickly to management but struggled to really make it a success because I still felt called to be in the Ministry helping other people and eventually I did just that while supporting my family with working in the restaurant business.
By this time(12 years later), I along with my wife have two kids and we are struggling to find career success in a church. We have been in 6 churches, with a brief hiatus back in the restaurant business looking for the big Success in life. There is a reason for this and it is because I was still allowing life to happen rather than making it happen deliberately. Can you relate to this?
This all leads to the present. It started in 2017, when I was tired of not having a clear direction and was introduced to a mentor who shared with me the principle of determining my direction rather than waiting for it to fall to me. This all changed the narrative of my life and through a process has determined my direction while still keeping my calling to help others and giving me a platform others find success. I am a Success Builder now.
I recognized the aimless pseudo-busy life I was living and struggling to get ahead was not getting me to a life with great purpose and direction. Success does not come to those who pursue it, It comes to those that become it. And although the end is still to come, I know now who I am and who I am becoming. Direction is set and will be reached and then sky’s the limit. I am determined to help as many as will listen (right now my goal is 50) to how to find this same direction. Our purposes may be different but the method to become successful at it is the same. Keep on listening and learning